We spend a lot of time on social media, and we get really acquainted with several stereotypes that we run into on, like, every post. It seems like they never change, no matter what platform you’re on. There’re always the same people posting the same types of info, whether it’s relevant or not.
As an ode to social media, we’re taking the time to break down the top five types of people you run into on social media, no matter how many times you try to soft block them.
1. The Know-It-All (a.k.a “Actuallies.”)
This is probably the most well-known type. We’ve all run into them. You post something, and the first comment you get starts with, “Actually…” No, shh. No one asked. Don’t be that person. No one wants to hear about why they’re wrong, and if they need to be corrected, it better not start with “actually.”
Imagine running into that person in real life (maybe you have to deal with that a lot—if so, we’re sorry). You start a conversation like, “Oh, I just love Starbucks. Their lattes are the best,” only to get back, “Actually Starbucks uses burnt espresso and doesn’t know how to froth their milk and blah blah blaaaaah.”
Yes. We know. We know our beloved Sbucks isn’t perfect, but can’t people just enjoy the little things from time to time without being told they’re wrong? Blocked.
2. The Diva – announces absence from social on social
The Diva is easy to spot. They’re the one who keeps posting about “taking on a new chapter” in their life or insists on talking about their weight loss shakes. They’re also the same person who talks about how much they hate drama and then post screenshots of DMs to stir things up.
The thing about divas is that they act like influencers, so their followers start to believe that they are influencers. Don’t be shocked to see that follower count skyrocket overnight.
Still, if you’re looking for a peaceful social media experience, they’re the last person you want to interact with. One wrong word, and you’ve got a horde of angry white knights after you, and that never ends well. Definitely blocked.
3. The Tinfoil Hat/Political Analyst
This person is in the same vein as the “Actuallies,” but they’re their own special breed of person. Tin Foil Hats always know something you don’t know, whether it’s the “truth” about what Twitter is supposedly doing with your information, or the secret to what’s really going on in the White House.
The Tinfoil hat is easy to spot. They use phrases like “experts claim…” or “did you know…” or “well they say…” (who the heck are “they,” anyway?). No matter what sort of logic you use to defend your love of Chipotle or IPA or whatever, the Tinfoil Hat will have a reason why you’re actually just a uniformed sheep.
And we have no time for people who think of us as sheeple. B-l-o-c-k-e-d.
4. The Anti-Social Social User
The Anti-Social Social user is a bit of an oxymoron. They’re the type that talks about unplugging and enjoying nature while still posting on Instagram.
They love to write long, flowery descriptions about photos of mundane moments. Their posts show them without their phones, surrounded by forests, and typically with the sun rising in the background. In fact, they’re probably selling essential oils or soap, too.
While we super love yoga (our Creative Lead is an instructor), the outdoors, and good smelling things, it can get overwhelming to see a million posts on social media that are specifically about not using social media. This type contributes beautiful photos and content, though, so we can’t resist following anyway.
5. The Animal Person
Okay, first off, this is us. We’re guilty as charged. Animal People do that thing where they post more photos of their pets than of themselves. They might even have a separate account for their dog (we’re looking at you, Lou).
Generally, Animal People are pretty chill (we’re biased), but they can get fierce if you say anything negative about their pets or animals in general (if you give up your pet because you had a baby – we are definitely blocking you). Still, we love those dog pictures. Followed.
Which one are you most like? Got any good stories about running into these types? We’d love to hear them. Comment below with your best tales. Just be sure not to tag the accounts in question…unless it’s us for being Animal People. We own up to that one.