Disclaimer: We want to make clear that this post does not address the recent, terrifying news of Kim Kardashian’s robbery. That is really shitty and is in no way associated with the drama we’re writing about in this blog. Just like every human, Kim deserves sympathy and understanding during this time.
OK, if you’ve been following entertainment fluff as closely as we have, you’ve probably collected all 3,245 of the Kardashian/Jenner’s phone numbers by now.
If you haven’t, let us give you some backstory:
Rob Kardashian is having a child with Blac Chyna. NBD, right? WRONG. Blac Chyna is also mother to Tyga’s child, and Tyga is dating Kylie Jenner, Rob’s sister. It’s like a real-life version of “I’m My Own Grandpa.” Got all that? No? Well, it’s fine. Google it on your own time because we’re trying to make a blog post that’s less than 700 words.
A couple weeks ago, the Kardashian/Jenner clan were in the middle of planning a baby shower for Rob. There was only one thing missing: His child’s mother. As the laws of physics go, “If an event happened in front of a Kardashian and was not publicly broadcast, said event did not exist.”
So, in keeping with the laws, Rob Kardashian tweeted half-sister Kylie Jenner’s phone number as payback for not inviting Blac Chyna to a shower for her baby. Naturally, the tweet got thousands of headlines and started trending. And if that wasn’t already enough, Blac Chyna tweeted out Rob‘s number within a couple days of the Kylie fiasco.
You see, that’s how life works when you’re in the Kardashian family. For the past 10 years, the family’s entire empire has been fueled by drama. The more, the better. From the star-making sex tape to a 72-day marriage and a whirlwind wedding after a month of dating, the more drama this family creates, the more buzz and ultimately, more $$$$.
Unfortunately, the Kardashian universe is an alternate one compared to us plebs. Drama works for them. Public embarrassment, scandals, shock and awe are part of their shtick. No other professional setting would tolerate the kind of drama that happens in one Kardashian minute. So don’t do it in your own professional setting.
Here, we take some lessons from the Kardashians and apply it to the professional realm.
If There’s an Issue, Address It Constructively
If you let issues build up, you might end up calling someone “an evil, ugly little troll,” as Kim said to Khloe for waking her up early. In Kim’s case, the outburst was a result of her unhappy marriage. Khloe was just the breaking point. In the professional realm, don’t let issues push you to your breaking point. Talk them out, schedule a meeting, get a mediator. If not, you might just ruin the entire day for Barb in accounting.
Know Your Alcohol Tolerance
Some of the best Kardashian moments are fueled by alcohol. Reality television is literally the only case where alcohol works to your advantage in a professional manner. You, on the other hand, need to go into professional and networking events knowing your tolerance, and staying far below that level. Give yourself a number and stick to it. If you want to take your top off by drink four, allow yourself two drinks. MAX.
Social Media is Not Your Best Friend
Save your venting for a one-on-one conversation – and by “one on one,” we don’t mean you and the Internet. Social media can be tempting to spill your guts to. You get attention and validation from your friends and followers. If you’re a Kardashian, it keeps you constantly relevant. But that’s where the positives end. Always remember who can see your social media accounts, which is everyone. Even if you keep your accounts locked down, screenshots and copy/paste still exist. Your followers can easily show your social media rants to the wrong person. So just don’t do it. Find a real best friend for that shit.
Find a Separation Between Your Personal and Professional Lives
What you do after hours is totally up to you. As long as it’s legal, it’s completely fine! Just don’t bring it into the office the next day. It’s fun to talk with and get to know colleagues, but there’s only so much they need to know about your personal life. Nobody wants to imagine the COO hanging over their bathroom toilet at 3 a.m.
Now who’s ever said the Kardashians do nothing? Look how much they’ve taught us in the past 10 years. We should be thanking them for providing us with a perfect roadmap for what not to do in our professional lives.
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