Anyone out there a morning person? Do you wake up to birds chirping and Happy by Pharrell playing in your head?
If so, WTF is wrong with you? We are the hit snooze at least 10 times, drink a gallon of coffee and debate washing our face type of people. We admit we have a few “morning people” on our team, but we make it a point to ridicule them and ensure they know they’re a bunch of weirdos. Since we know you’re dying to read what we do in the morning, we’re sharing the “morning” people and the “hit the snooze 15 times” people routines.
We created a chart to share the comparisons:
| Good Morning People | Snooze It People | Notes |
| Alarm goes off, hop out of bed with a smile on face. | Hit snooze. | No one should wake up smiling. |
| Brush teeth, wash face. | Hit snooze. | Hygiene is important. Reminder: make your 6-month dentist appointment. |
| Eat a healthy breakfast, feed other family members. | Hit snooze. | Okay, Martha Stewart. |
| Morning meditation or some form of physical exercise. | Hit snooze. | Some of us meditate while sleeping. |
| Coffee time. | Hit snooze. | Perhaps add in dog snuggle or cat pets. |
| Journal | Roll over and hit snooze. | Feelings. |
| Water plants (WTF) | Open eyes. Look at phone. Shit. | Who has plants they actually water? |
| Sit outside with tea or coffee and just breathe. | Shower? No time. Brush Teeth? I guess. Do hair? Bun it is. | Dry shampoo for the win. |
| Pack lunch and snack (more than likely done the day before). | Starbucks to-go order. I am so late. | Caffeine is essential for non-morning people. |
It’s pretty clear the non-morning people are the real winners here. If you’re looking to up your morning routine, get one of those alarms that smacks you in the face or douses you with water.
And always, always, wake up with Happy Hour Hustle.
